Dna Turf

A lawnmower man – actually, that makes him sound like a serial killer in a horror film – a landscape gardener is not a servant. And yet I don’t feel I can review DNA Turf without invoking Gosford Park’s upstairs/​downstairs dichotomy. Not because I was upstairs while the boys from DNA were doing their thing, but rather because they were heard and not seen. One minute the grass was long, the next there was a lawnmower going, and before I could even pretend to be Dame Maggie Smith the grass was somewhat shorter.
We had to juggle the timing a little, and DNA were more than happy to oblige, fitting us in where we asked to be fit despite the fact that it’s the holiday season and everyone seems to be having their lawns cut. Some people, of course, cut their own lawns, choosing to be upstairs and downstairs at once, but ours is a lawn that currently hosts a portable lavatory and an awkwardly-​angled skip, so we didn’t really have that option, and besides prefer this luxury. And, given the quality of the result, a luxury is certainly what it is.