L’OV Milano

#79−2016:
What a PITY!!!
Though it is half across town, this could have easily become my Sunday brunch whenever (and it is, alas, more and more often the case) I feel homesick with cravings for a splurging American style breakfast… ok… NOT quite AMERICAN, but as American as I can expect it to be on Milan soil (forget sausage, hashbrowns, waffles, chorizo…)
A group of Unilocalers decided to gather for brunch around 10:30ish (could it have been the number 13 that jinxed the whole experience?) To discuss our latest read for the book club.
If you have ever gone out to eat with a bunch of Italians you’ll know we take:
1) forever to choose our meal
2) we like to mix things up to adjust it to our taste.
Most of the bunch got the American Traditional Breakfast (which included: eggs, bacon on 2 slices of toast, 2 salty pancakes with tomatoes). Well, all except me decided they wanted their pancakes sweet (simply with syrup on top) instead of the salty option. Then a few other requests (NONE OF which had variations from what was written on the menu).
Almost EVERYONE then opted for freshly squeezed oranges. Most asked for American coffee (some asked for a cappuccino). Few opted for yogurt…
10 minutes (which we filled with talks about the book) passed before the first few beverages arrived… PLENTY drinks missing.. There goes the 1^st star. (By the way… it took 40 minutes to have EACH requested drink brought over… many other tables were served ahead of us despite coming after us).
Another 15 minutes and the first plates arrive… confusion started hitting the waiters and we started getting on the aggravated side… 2^nd star gone… I asked REPEATEDLY if the plate (which was EXACTLY like everyone else… NOT including the tomatoes) I had in front of me was indeed the right one… A good 10 more minutes passed… panic engulfing the staff…
Food started getting cold… I didn’t DARE starting to eat for fear it were the wrong plate…
Simple orders such as a brioches with capuccino took little over 1 hour to arrive. Others got the yogurt before their scrambled eggs… it was complete chaos!!!
Ah… in all this. NO tomatoes were delivered… I was simply brought some jamòn Serrano (so typically American, don’t you say?).
At one point the chef came out asking if everything was OK… that is when we all at a unison said «NO»
We still lacked ingredients here and there (as simple as a bit of butter or jam for those who wanted and asked for it).
My sunnyside up was cooked Italian style (the white still a bit gewey on top) which was sort of ok for me but not for. Fellow Eater or 2… The scrambled eggs were way to orangey to even have ANY white in them and they were huge chunks).
Bacon? Not as crispy as I am used to but perfectly salty. The slices of bread were pretty dry and without butter they were average. The pancakes were sort of ok but the syrup they brought over was NOT enough for everyone… 3^rd star gone
I am saving this place from a complete disastrous 1-​star-​review because I am feeling magnanimous on Valentine’s Day…
Though I should bring it down one more star when the manager came and instead of apologizing for the agony we had been experiencing he simply said «you didn’t order from the right person»… too bad he showed up almost by the time it was all over… AND, by 12 he asked us to get up and leave because they needed to clean for lunch…
SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!!
You need to get your act together or no ammount of «we’re cool, you just got us all confused» is gonna save you from losing a whole lot of clientele!!!
PS: me no likey… me no coming back. … me no gonna suggest the place to ANYONE I know …

The food here is OK.
The atmosphere is not too shabby.
The service is good.
The tiramisu is delicious.
But the killer feature is free Wi-​Fi.
Italian internet is horrible. Even if you pay for it.
But the Wi-​Fi here is quite reliable. In a pinch, you can go in to work in the afternoon without fear — and have a cup of coffee and a sandwich while you work.
The guy behind the counter also is in a love affair with NYC — so let him know where you are from — his friend recently opened a pizzeria in SoHo. He’ll hook you up to connect with the owner for some tasty neapolitan pies ;)
BUT AGAIN — WIFI SHOULD NOT BE UNDERESTIMATED. IT IS GREATER THAN COFFEE. GREATER THAN PIZZA. I CAN’T BELIEVE I SAID THAT.