International School of Tanganyika

The International School of Tanningnaked is the most popular school among prissy superficial girls everywhere. Especially my Texan Mexican American White Hispanic (not really sure what she is but she’s f***ing amazing) doll, who would much rather go to Tanning school than any other school, I would imagine. However this is not that school. This is an old British institution on the peninsula right by the ocean just north of the city centre of «Dar» in South East Africa.
My 3^rd and final African entry on Unilocal… and there won’t be any more for quite some time, I assure you… is for a 3^rd different nation. Having written the first ever review for Morrocco and the first ever review for Tunisia, it feels only right that I now write the first ever review of Tanzania, the only African country I’ve visited as a nearly-​adult (I was actually a teenager).
As described in my 1993 Hill End review, I went to Tanzania within a few years of 1995, which is why this is review #1995. I spent a month there. The highlights were crossing the country by train, then crossing it back again in the back of an open-​air truck with a metal cage. Before the 2 journeys, me and the other kids (and 3 teachers) stayed in this International school in tropical, exciting, dangerous Dar Es Salaam. What a thrilling experience that was. I can’t wait to go back.
The highlights of this actual place were the lovely quarters… the insane amount of mosquitos… the cold showers (they didn’t have any hot ones… brrr)… the amazing pool, which we spent all day in, pretty much… the palm trees… and the very short walking distance to both the Indian Ocean, and the centre of the city of Dar.
It’s obviously a 5-​star place. No doubts.
And here, again, is my explanation and disclaimer, adapted from the Morrocco and Tunisia reviews:
What do you want me to do Unilocal?This school exists on sites like TripAdvisor, FourSquare, on Google, on Facebook. Do you want me to go sign up for one of those sites and review it there? No, I didn’t think so. I’m reviewing it here and putting it on an Island in the Med until you can get some Unilocal presence in Tanzania and then we’ll be all good to go.
So, yes, it’s true. I am putting this international school on Unilocal,even though there is no Tanzania on Unilocal yet. For this reason, I’m sticking it on the Island of Majorca, which is in the Mediterranean Sea. Once TZ finally gets on Unilocal,I will transfer it over. I’ve seen other people do this, and have advised other people to do this, and now it’s finally my turn. Is this the first ever Unilocal review in Tanzania? I don’t know. I’m fairly sure it is. And by the way the map marker for all three reviews is fairly accurate, at least.
And who wouldn’t want to go to the International School of Tangerines? It would be such a dream. And would make us all a little fruity. Orange you glad you read this review? Hopefully you’re not melon-​choly anymore. And yes I would like to marry you, but I want a proper wedding. We Canteloupe. Sorry. And by the way, I like boys. Where did that cute mango? Oh crap is that the time? I have to go, lime flies when you’re having fun. Papaya! See you tomato!