Rabbi Sara Shendelman

Rabbi Sara was just wonderful. We are from Chicago so before flying out to Berkeley, we spoke with Rabbi Sara through Skype a few times so that she could get to know us better and tell us how she structures the ceremony. We were nervous about everything going according to plan since we were planning a wedding from out of state, but Rabbi Sara made sure everything was perfect. She visited some restaurants for us and told us good vendors to use. We also are a same sex couple that got married on Shabbat, so we were thrilled that Rabbi Sara was able to accommodate us!
We especially loved how in the ceremony every one of our guests were given an opportunity to say some words to us. We had 30 guests, and everyone loved that intimate aspect of our ceremony. It was very unique and special, and such an amazing day!

Rabbi Sara gave us a ceremony far more beautiful than we imagined. We wanted something non denominational, as neither of us has a particular religious affiliation, and she was truly accommodating to our wishes. She worked with us every step of the way, she was available whenever we needed, and she went far beyond our expectations to ensure that our ceremony was special and lovely. Her professionalism, kindness, wisdom, and loveliness is exceptional. I recommend her to anyone for a fabulous ceremony. Our guests loved the ceremony, and they loved Rabbi Sara.
Also, she is a great photographer! She sent us some gorgeous photos after the wedding.

Rabbi Sara Shendelman is the most sincere, deep, lovely, funny, brilliant, and kind wedding officiant. We met a few others first, in our search for a truthful and personal ceremony.
She officiated our wedding last week end. With only a few days to prepare, she met with us, made many suggestions for the ceremony, accepted our choices, listened to our opinions, and produced the most beautiful off-​the –charts moving, meaningful, precious ceremony, completely tailored to our histories and our needs. What a magnificent woman to work with! We will both be ever grateful.
It was a small event but each guest expressed their delight with Rabbi Sara and the wedding ceremony.

I visited rabbi Sara at her home with my ex-​fiancé (who will be known as Mr. Crazypants Liar going forward) early October for a January 24^th ceremony. I ended up not needing a rabbi because Mr. Crazypants Liar. And I’m not ready to get married again. This review is spinning wildly off-​topic, so… if you meet someone who is not a Mr. Crazypants Liar and you want to nail him down, go see Rabbi Sara! But if you do meet Mr. Crazypants Liar, don’t.

My husband and I came from Christian and Catholic backgrounds. This was not our first marriage and it was extremely important to me that we get the «best person» to unite us and our blended families «under God». We felt very blessed with Rabbi Shendelman. She made our wedding a beautiful, memorable experience. She even turned an awkward situation (when his teenage daughter called his cell phone that was in his suit pocket in the middle of the ceremony). She smiled and began to dance to the ringer’s song! Lol. I would highly recommend her to anyone who wants real blessings at their wedding!

I can not possibly overstate how wonderful our experience was working with Rabbi Shendelman! When the Supreme Court decisions were announced we decided to have our wedding on Labor Day Weekend 2013 (the closest 3 day weekend from the decision). That gave us about 6 weeks to plan our wedding in its entirety. We pulled it off with 70 guests at the Sheraton Palo Alto with the whole sha-​bang!
Rabbi Shendelman was the icing on the cake. Because of her, the ceremony was fabulous. Our guests raved about how loving and inclusive and FUN the ceremony was for them! She offered the guests the opportunity to participate in a meaningful way that neither they nor we had experienced at a wedding ceremony before.
We interviewed other wedding officiants and we felt an instant connection with Rabbi Shendelman. She has a grace and knowing way about her. She quickly got to know us and walked us through the development of a very personal and meaningful ceremony. The day of the wedding she provided words of wisdom that not only kept us present but added a spiritually fulfilling energy to the proceedings.
We did not discover Rabbi Shendelman through Unilocal,but we are so happy to be able to write this review that others might decide to include her wonderful soul on their special day!
Thanks!

We were so happy to have Rabbi Sara as the officiant at our wedding ceremony. Rabbi Sara was so easy to work with. Before the ceremony she really made me feel comfortable. This was great especially since I was nervous! Rabbi Sara performed a beautiful ceremony and was absolutely wonderful. She was very open to what we wanted in a wedding ceremony and obliged to our requests. She also provided her own ideas which we loved. We definitely recommend Rabbi Sara for any couple looking for an open and very calming officiant.

My husband and I struggled to find a wedding officiant, partly because while we knew some of the elements to the ceremony that were important to us, we felt stuck about how to proceed. Just two months or so from the big day, we spoke with Rabbi Sara on the phone and knew she was the one for us. She insisted that creating a meaningful ceremony didn’t necessarily require a lot of time, and it didn’t. We met with her twice at her Berkeley home (she was always accommodating about scheduling), did some fun homework (consisting mostly of reading other people’s vows and ketubahs for inspiration), and came up with something that everyone loved. She provided a lovely chuppah, too, which was going to be a hassle, and expensive, to rent on our own.
I am not Jewish, and Rabbi Sara was also very welcoming of my experiences. She explained things, was never patronizing, and helped me find a way to recognize some of the other faith traditions in attendance. She recognized the importance of the situation, but also the fun/​joy.
At the actual ceremony, Rabbi Sara was also great at going with the flow – when one of our youngest guests made a comment about the rings, she brought them over for him to see and incorporated it into the ceremony. Moments like that made the ceremony really special.
I highly recommend working with Sara!

We booked Rabbi Sara a few years back for a nondenominational ceremony. She told us that we could write our own ceremony and she would do whatever we wanted. Fast forward to just before the ceremony and she changed her tune. She said she had a format that she stuck to and that was what she was going to do. All of a sudden during our wedding she decided that she would sing, ring bowls, and make us recite parts of our ceremony in Hebrew? Yiddish? Not sure as neither of us are Jewish. She forced parts of her views on us and made the ceremony vary awkward for us and our families.
After the ceremony she grabbed food for not just herself but for 2 other people we hadn’t invited before my wife and I had a chance to eat. She then came back later and packed Tupperware with food from our reception to take home with her.
Our families and friends still talk about the bizarre behavior she displayed at our wedding.
UPDATE: Rabbi Sara has responded and I would like to talk about her rebuttal point by point.
1) «Perhaps afterwards they wish they had done it differently.»
Answer: No. We provided her with a plan for the ceremony a full week before. We requested certain things and gave her a fully written plan as to what we wanted. On the day of our ceremony she showed up and said she didn’t have the printed plan that we had put into her hands. She then proceeded to do what she wanted against our wishes which included singing, ringing bowls, asking our guests to toast us during the ceremony, and making us say parts of our vows in a language neither I nor my wife understood.
2) «As for bringing someone; I was supplying the sound system for free and brought a helper along to help me carry the heavy pieces (my daughter). This is quite normal for any vendor.»
Answer: Again no. My father in law paid to have someone come in to hook up the speakers, run the mics, and provide the music cues. No one was needed to help lug in any equipment for Rabbi Sara. If someone drove her to the site that would be fine but…
3) «At the end of the reception, one of their friends who was in charge of the food which was delivered said there was way too much left and would I please take something home. I was handed a pan which I accepted.»
Answer: *sigh* NO. Lets start at the beginning of this misstatement, «At the end of the reception,» Rabbi Sara took off well before the reception was at its middle point. Before my wife and I had a chance to go to the buffet to get our food Rabbi Sara had helped herself to large quantities of what we had provided. She then went off with two people away from our reception and fed the unnamed wedding crashers with food we had paid for. My wife and I found out about this only as we sat down with our own food and watched with our own eyes as she walked off with her guests. When we arrived at the buffet we had paid for we found that there were certain foods that we never got to try. I can’t say for certain that it was because we were deprived of that because of Rabbi Sara but it doesn’t help put your mind at ease when you find out someone has been hogging food for uninvited guests. Later we observed Rabbi Sara coming back to the buffet and loading up more food that she then walked away with. No one handed her «a pan.» But she seemed to have the means to take food home with her. Numerous guests complained to us about how she took liberties with our buffet.
P. S. After she had been away, and we thought gone, for more than an hour she strode back into our reception to make my wife and I take a picture together for her camera. Although we were both totally done with her behavior we squeezed together a smile and sent her off with her two unnamed companions.
4) «I gladly offered them a free service if they would ever want that.»
Answer: No free service was ever offered and why would it be if you thought you had done your best? My wife and I had one wedding that we put together with our hard effort with just the help of a few friends, family, and very little money. We did all the big work and on the day of our wedding Rabbi Sara couldn’t honor our wishes. It just became the Rabbi Sara show. If you want to offer us a free service then you can return what we paid for our wedding and I’ll delete both the review and the stain you placed on the memory of our wedding day.

We could have not been happier with Rabbi Sara. Her ceremony was perfect and our guest are still talking about how original and special the ceremony was! Thank you so much! Hope to you see you again soon! We would highly recommend Rabbi Sara if you are looking for a rabbi for your wedding!

I am also a wedding officiant, and Rabbi Sara and I recently shared officiating a destination wedding in Cabo San Lucas. It was a sunset wedding on a cliff overlooking the beach. There were lots of unexpected surprises, like a late-​starting wedding and no lighting as it got darker and then dark. Rabbi Sara handled everything that came up with an attitude of calm professionalism and levity. Her manner is flexible as well as confident in leading wedding ceremonies. She took the time to connect with the parents and the bridal party. I hope to work with her again soon!

I have been to several weddings that Rabbi Sara Shendelman has performed, for couples from various religions, cultures, and lifestyles. These are joyous occasions, each unique and special. She does a fabulous job, creating a custom ceremony with each couple. She even involves family & friends within the ceremony if this is desired.
With her years of experience she is very helpful… having contacts and suggestions for locations, clothing, photographers, everything involved in wedding planning. She has a wonderful personality and is very endearing, as well as an entertaining wedding officiant. She is a talented singer, and some ceremonies I have been to included music.
I heard numerous guests say it was the best ceremony they had ever been to, or that they would not hesitate to recommend her, or if I ever get married you’ll be hearing from me.
Sara is flexible in her pricing and has great people skills… her goal is to make a special day, with special memories. Best wedding ceremonies I have ever experienced, no wonder people hire her to travel around the country, even out of the country to perform ceremonies.
Highly recommended!

My husband and I had already been together for 12 years prior to having Hank wed us. Neither of us had been in a hurry to marry. Then, my fiancé found out his mother was gravely ill and the two of us needed to fly out of the country to see her and her side of the family right away. We decided we wanted to get married before leaving US soil.
We called Sara at the last moment, to see if she could marry us within a couple of hours. She returned our call with a willingness to wed us that very day. We would have chosen her as our officiant had we not been lucky enough to speak with another officiant by phone right after calling her phone and leaving a message on her machine.
This positive review is based on Sara’s flexibility (that she was willing to wed us if the other person we reached, couldn’t). Also, Sara was very nice on the phone and seems like a genuinely big-​hearted person who is passionate and dedicated to her profession!