Boomerang Carwash

I normally go to the one in Cordova on Germantown Pkwy but my car was filthy, I was right there, and a Boomerang car wash is a Boomerang car wash, right? WRONG. All washes are not created equal!
It starts at the payment kiosk, I purchased a «Best» car wash ($ 12) and requested a receipt. Negative. No dice, no receipt, now frustrated because car washes are tax deductible, I pull around to the entrance. …waiting, as I think where is the attendant? Well he’s chatting with a customer. Forgive me, I’ll take the high road and assume he was resolving an issue. Because surely he saw me pull through the gate and saw me parked and no customer service representative worth salt would leave a customer waiting while they shoot the breeze, right?
So I tell… Bob, we’ll call him Bob, as I don’t know his name. He didn’t introduce himself and I don’t recall seeing a name tag. *no offense to any Bobs*…the machine didn’t give me a receipt I think it maybe out of paper.
Bob: No, it’s probably just broke again.
Me: –_​^
Bob: Do you want me to print you one?
Me: Yes, please. … seeing to it’s tax deductible and all…
Bob: hands me the receipt and a lollipop and instructs me to put the car in neutral.
As my car advances through the wash I’m thinking, ooohhhh this one goes a lot slower, it’s getting my car good and clean, right? I exit the wash and park in a spot to towel dry. Low and behold, did it sure get soapy! How do I know? Because there was soap all along the passenger side of the car and the windshield. The End.