Ann Summers

I don’t really get Ann Summers. Not in a sense that I can’t find anything in there for me to wear (cross dressing isn’t really my thing), but more in the sense that I really wouldn’t be that interested in my girlfriend wearing any of their stuff for special times.
It’s just all a bit tacky and not actually that sexy, in my opinion. There, said it.

Ann Summers is a store that you’re boyf will urge you to enter!
Other than that if you’re thinking of sexy lingerie to spice up some night or just feel great on the inside. But to me, if you want sexy and kinky on your plate with sauciness, hit Agent Provocateur! Much much better!
Ann Summers is more nurse costumes, one-​liner underwear and things like that. And to add, it is also ridiculously expensive! I mean for the things that’s there, it is. I feel it wants to get onto the Agent P line, but fails heavily!
So I would prefer La Senza and then move onto Agent P, but if you like nurse and catwoman outfits, Ann Summers might be your stop.

This place is really good if you’re looking for awesome, sexy and nevertheless good quality lingerie. They have a variety of colors and models to choose from and I can guarantee you will find at least something that will match you preferences. The prices are a bit up, but most of the times they have really good offers, like 3 bras for the price of two. It is a pleasure to go and shop there, not only for a special occasion, but if you fancy casual underwear as well. If you feel really naughty, you can go downstairs and impress your partner with an amazing collection of sex toys, fancy dress, games and accessorizes that will blow you away. I like the packaging as well, it is quite discreet and you can carry on shopping for the rest of the day without anyone knowing what secrets you might hide in your little fancy, pink bag. My advice is to take a look around, you won’t be disappointed.

Way back when I was 19, before I discovered the boyf and his wonderful ways, I did for a short time date a (male) Ann Summers employee. No, he was not some kind of mad perv-​O, but yes he did like a lot of the shizzle they sell. This unfortunately meant that I was often gifted Ann Summers merch, and was expected to wear their horrid scratchy lace bras and confusing knickers. Don’t get me wrong, I love sexy undies and whatnot, but in all my years I have never seen anything at all ‘me’ in their ‘sexy’ ranges. Ann Summers Ex told me that the Ann Summers head office was particularly proud of the Manchester Arndale branch, that it is seen as a great example of the ideal AS store. Really? In my experience, I’ve found the Arndale store to be understaffed by rude assistants, freezing cold, and totally lacking in any stock over a C cup (which did grant me escape from being bought another horrid bra). It’s not an old store and I know they redecorated recently, but it’s pretty shabby looking inside. And on a side note, you know those sticky gusset protector things on knickers? A LOT of the pants here don’t have one on. That just makes me want to gag, to be honest.
AS is pretty much the last place I”ll be found on a shopping trip. Sure, they have a great range of toys, accessories and, erm, media, but so do websites like Lovehoney, which are far superior in pretty much every way. I kind of feel like everything in AS is tacky. I mean, sure, every woman wants to feel sexy, but I just feel like a novelty school uniform with red ‘Please Sir’ pants (me either) isn’t sexy. It’s both hugely degrading and overly coy. Agent Provocateur sell sexy so well, and it’s not always classy; sometimes it’s crotchless and downright filthy, but they steer well clear of old Ann’s smutty postcard idea of sex.
Apart from being presented with an ill-​judged ‘peephole’ bra and a hopeful smile from A.S. Ex, my abiding memory of old Ann is of my mum and her drunk female friends howling with drunken laughter at a mid-​90s AS party in our lounge while the siblings and I sat upstairs, basically mortified. You try finding anything in here sexy whilst imagining your mum and all her friends handing vibrators around and laughing. Yep, thought so.
(For those of you who are curious, A.S. Ex was jettisoned before the official three month mark, the peephole bra went in the bin without being tried on, and this little Unilocaler won’t be going back to Ann any time soon.)

Ooh-​er, missus, how’s your father and other Carry On phrases. Here be Ann Summers, a shop that when the BF and I were first dating, just seeing one another, he dragged me into for a laugh. It was then that I knew I’d be with him almost four years later. Well, perhaps not, but I hoped I’d be. He’s a cheeky one.
I have to be completely honest, over the years I’ve discovered that Ann Summers is not what I thought it was. I always deemed it to be high class, saucy underwear that you’d see on the likes of Dita Von Teese or something, but I’ve realised that Agent Provocateur has that market covered, and Ann Summers? It’s been reduced to nurse costumes, elephant crotch pouches, PVC and those dreaded peephole bras and panties. *Shudders.* While the naughty downstairs area is still a lot of fun and offers the best in raunchy playtime items and reading material, well… I just don’t think it belongs where it does, on a main high street, opposite Boots, next to a mobile phone store. Seeing a Santa lady in suspenders when people are dragging their families round on a Saturday is somewhat incongruous.
The mix of underwear is weird, from your standard generic La Senza fare to the aforementioned rude bits. And don’t get me started on the prices. It’s darn expensive for what it is. Oh, and ladies? For the record, you’re wasting your money, your boytoy (or girltoy depending on your preferences) is interested in your underwear for a total of a nanosecond. Generally, they don’t care if you’re wearing it or not. But still, great for a pocket-​size copy of the Karma Sutra. Just not necessarily something you want to be reading on public transport…

Possibly the only place on earth that brings you the uncomfortable fushion of strippers, house wives, internet perverts who live with their mums and people who think Father Christmas is sexy– seriously, Santa themed sexy underwear?
Despite her famous Ann Summers parties which bring the bingo crowd to your house to laugh at dildos that threaten to smash your coffee table, Ann has managed to achieve something of a respectable, upper market reputation on the high street which allows her to charge prices as indecent as a pair of crotchless undies.
A very pricey way to look silly and get cold.