Carlton Club

Hot DAMN, this place is old school. Lovely though, and with such class that’s not pretentious at all.
I did rather feel that as a woman, I shouldn’t be allows to ‘roam the halls’ unattended, but that didn’t make me feel uncomfortable.
I went to a breakfast event here, which was really fun. The central location made it easy to get to, the staff were all really attentive and polite, but the coffee and pastries? Hmm. Not so good. In fact, quite poor. For such a grand place, I think they either need to change their suppliers or start cooking in-​house.

My boss was kind enough to take me for lunch to the Carlton Club. Although an almost makeshift «Conservative play-​den» I was surprised as to how friendly it seemed. There was the odd stuffy customer as expected (complaining about stale roles and cold meat), but the food was pretty good and the waiters and waitresses were polite and friendly, even sharing a joke now and then.

I’ve been a couple of times with various politically active friends. The drawing room on the first floor is jaw-​droppingly beautiful. Looks-​wise, this is easily my favourite London club. The club wine is average but cheap. Access to the decent stuff comes at a punishing premium, which is disappointing. Spirits are cheap but the servant who took my order once had to ask me how to make a pink gin — not impressed.
The food is overpriced with small, pretentiously presented portions. What I ate was very well cooked but I rather resent being charged for vegetables and potatoes at £3ish a pop. I can’t fault the service in the dining room — very attentive and knowledgeable.

My dearest seeker of the London and England of yore: this is the answer to your prayers.
No tourists. No yuppies. No pretention.
Just a remarkable crowd, a historic setting, a kitchen one could be excused for believing God managed himself and the standard of service inherent in places where the patrons know exactly what they desire will greet you beyond the seemingly unremarkable door of the Carlton Club.
One day a good friend of yours will offer to take you to this wonderful club. Treat it as a honour second solely to meeting Her Majesty.
You will come close to begging to go back, realizing soon enough that a good friend, a «please» and a mutually convenient time are all it takes. Because there’s no pretention. It’s a private members club, not a celebrity-​spotting night joint.
Which is exactly why the Carlton Club is the place to go and hang out with some of the world’s most remarkable people.
If you’re having dinner your friend will know the drill, the menu and the best options. I recommend choosing the main courses from the daily menu (not the big a-​la-​carte one) and a dessert from the full menu, with house wine.
Following that, do ask your friend for a small tour of the place, then chill next to the fireplaces in the drawing room with a glass of port or sherry. Have an intellectual conversation and wonder how, by what twisted turn of fate has the world fallen from the grace, class and composture this club still thankfully embodies.

Gentlemen’s club in St James’s, my dad is a member there. It really is like travelling back to the 1940s, with the potential of bumping into and sharing a cigar moment with Winston Churchill. Members include a who’s who of conservative politics, so it may or may not be your bag! There is a really comfortable bar on the first floor if you can get into the club.