The Den

No, just… no.
We had a major school deadline at midnight on a Sunday and this was the only place open, so we put our pride and good judgement aside and gave it a shot.
Just… no. We should have bought a bottle of whiskey and gone to the park.
The website touts a Sunday night with dancing, drinks and the option of a relaxed chat with friends, taking place over a variety of spaces: garden, terrace, bar, ect. Okay, so granted, this is advertized as «PULSE» with a picture of Carmen Electra… but… we thought it might not be so bad.
In reality, only the downstairs space was open, which is a fairly small room, half of which is roped off as the saddest VIP section I’ve ever seen. It’s a £10 cover for no particular reason (if the DJ did anything other than stream Top 40, I’d be shocked), the drinks are way overpriced, and the staff is outrageously rude and snobby. At every single point. We were the only people in the place, and the coat check guy insisted on physically moving the two of us around to form what, in his mind, was some kind of orderly system, and barked orders at us about not being fast enough, standing in the wrong place, waiting for my change in the wrong place, ect. Only.people.there.
The door, the bar, the security, all just absolute super-​douches.
The crowd was, as expected, mostly tourists and weird, weird business men, clearly sent there by companies or embassies or something.
But I guess this is all pretty much obvious. Sunday night in London. Oxford Street. Duh. But truly, do save your money and find another way to get smashed if you absolutely must do so late at night during the week (and we absolutely had to, so we learned that lesson for you).

or formally known as THE END. See what cleverness they did there? Golly it was like going back in the time machine! Everything was the same down from the décor and crazy toilet lady down to the bitchy door girl and bouncers (don’t do your shit at the door, come prepared as a goul, as I blooded up BEHIND my friends waiting to be checked if they were goulish enough to get in free for halloween because we didn’t know that was the deal). And telling us there was a queue behind us? I vaguely remember when queues used to mean going around the entire city block and not taking 2 seconds to get in. A 2 seconds wait is NOT queueing… what the heck are you talking about??? Initially drinks were super cheap, but then our last round of 4 drinks (beers and 1 water) came to nearly £20 (definitely me, who insist on having water bottles to refill and not slosh anywhere when dancing). The music was fun– on Popstarz night, definitely of the happy variety.
Except now, one thing my dear. You are no longer the be all and end all of London clubs. You don’t have (the now much more famous) Erol Alkan living there and you host a super fun and super gay clubnight on Fridays. Trash might have been once one of the greatest moments of dance history but that is finito. You know what this means?
Do the F*&^ away with the attitude, because you ain’t got it no more. You are now merely a club with a so-​so reputation, so get off your damned high horse.
Luckily I do love my friends, so great time as usual… plus all that fun remembering where all that stuff happened to us? Just an extra plus.

I may only be giving this place five stars because I was highly drunk and got in for free? But I dont care. Im giving it five stars.
It stayed open till six am, and in San Diego, that is UNHEARD of. In fact, its illegal. So, when my girlfriend and I went to London, we were stoked. Booze was bit more pricey, but you kinda have to expect that when youre in London.

If you’ve been around a little while you may remember the days when the only place worth going to after three a.m. was the End on West Central Street. It was connected to A.K.A. which was generally the earlier gig, served up pizza and often had DJs like Pancho Sancha playing quality house sets.
The site was closed down and sold on with plans of redevelopment, but those plans were parked as the lending market dried up, and so the Den and Centro were reborn.
My friends tell me that Jet Black/​the Den/​Centro is now the celeb spotting place to go. Indeed there were paparazzi outside which leads me to believe this is true. The other factor which leads me to believe it also true is that inside the Den now resides the meat market crowd. Gone are the days when you used to be able to go to the End and dance your socks off without a care in the world. Now you have to be on duty to beat off the creeps and social pariahs who constantly try and chat you up and mawl your friends. Another classic symptom of places that earn the celeb spotting name.
Creeps aside, the Den is laid out much as before with slightly more furnishing. Two main rooms (there is a third but this was closed off) mainly playing two different house sets. Drinks are reasonably priced and the ladies’ don’t have toilet seats, that hasn’t changed.
Sadly for me, been a surviving veteran of the End days and remembering how good they were, I can bring myself to look in the eye of the Den crowd.
I did not make it into Centro but I imagine it has degraded in much the same way.
Unfortunately still the only places in that neighbourhood that give you the freedom to party in 7am, this being their primary selling point.
And that, as they say, is all I have to say about that.