Hot Topic

Like many Unilocalers, I imagine, I too have long since aged out of Hot Topic’s target demographic.
I don’t wear skinny black anything.
I am piercing-​free.
I no longer riddle my denim or leather jackets with buttons advertising free hugs.
Sailor Moon does nothing for me.
I buy pants with suspender buttons, and suspenders with loops for said buttons, rather than neon clip-​ons.
My taste in music includes neither «Avenged Sevenfold» nor «Wiz Khalifa». I do know who these performers are. I just prefer the safe music of my youth, with it’s talk of school shootings, heavy drug use and general apocalyptic weirdness.
I have many books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.
That said, I am a proud nerd, which makes Hot Topic worth a browse whenever I visit the Eaton Centre. I wish I could pull off a Magneto hooded sweatshirt at work, or any of their comic book merch. I do own a few superman and batman t-​shirts. It’s like the adult version of underoos.
I marvel at the selection of Doctor who items, and yearn for cheeky dalek-​print clothing.
I am a shameless consumer of professional wrestling t-​shirts; I have reserved my purple «Macho Man» number to wear at the hospital for the birth of my first child.
I only wish they kept more stock. I often find them sold out of items that I want, so I keep coming back.

I’m 20 years older than Hot Topic’s target customer, so it makes sense that I haven’t heard of any of the bands on the t-​shirts they sell. My piercings don’t correspond to the body jewelery on display and I don’t understand what Angry Birds are all about. Now that Hot Topic is finally in Canada, it’s too late for me to shop there. It’s not so much of a goth store anymore and I agree that the merch is tacky and badly made. I’m much more impressed with the selection at Spencer Gifts.

What to make of Hot Topic? Well, I own a Hot Topic membership card. Don’t judge me. Hot Topic sells clothes for, what you’d call in my day, «wankers». It’s rock ‘n’ roll and hip hop tshirts, slut wear, bangles, and (oddly enough) snappy cardigans. I like the snappy cardigans (
). I’ve found with the hoodies I’m just not wearing the hood. I have nothing to hide from security cameras.
I dunno.
Some of the musical youth tshirts have interesting art and suitable for workout out wear at Goodlife when you want to set yourself apart from the other 40 year olds wearing TD bank branded tshirts.
Me (purchasing a Wiz Khalifa tshirt): Is this a band of some sort?
Hot Topic Dude: Yes. I believe it’s a rapper out of Philly.
Me: Oh. I just like the art work. I’ll look him up on wikipedia.
Hot Topic Dude: *blink*
Me: Am I not cool enough to wear this tshirt if my source on hip hop is wikipedia?
Hot Topic: You want a frequent customer card?
Me: Sure.
Snappy cardigans in popular sizes seem to go quickly. I went back a couple times looking for a nifty grey cotton cardigan in my size but they were sold out. They had plenty of mediums and 2XL. Hrmph. I went back a third time and the whole cardigan line was no longer on the shelves.