Toronto Institute of Bartending

My obsession with cocktails has reached a juniper-​soaked fever pitch. Just the other day I scraped together unused egg whites from breakfast to fashion an early afternoon bourbon flip. Totally unnecessary. So too are the infused simple syrups I make in my spare time. And I think I buy way more fresh limes and lemons than is typical of a person without scurvy. I think I have a problem, but I can’t seem to SHAKE it.
So I took some classes. Located in a rather non-​descript location at Adelaide and Portland, the Toronto Institute of Bartending is the place to get edified in the ways of the drink. Their «classroom» is a fully-​equiped bar where you pull up a stool and get your learn on. Their bartender certification program includes lessons in product knowledge, tastings (Sippin’ Patron at 11am? Yep.), and of course many hours behind the bar, mixing, shaking and stirring.
TIB was quick to emphasize that this class is about bartending — not mixology. You don’t only learn how to make drinks but how to serve and treat customers. This is definitely crucial stuff for anyone wanting to break into the industry. There was good practical advice about how awesome working in a nightclub is (spoiler alert: it’s not), and helpful tips on how and where to find gainful employment as a barkeep.
Our instructor was Chris, a long-​time tender of bar at various Toronto haunts. He really knew his stuff and kept the lessons casual and breezy. He wasn’t afraid to tell the two unfortunate lovers of Smirnoff Ice in our class to «GTFO» (something I truly appreciate) and he blasted music during our practical work. He’s also quite man-​pretty which I just thought I’d mention for the ladies (and curious men) out there.
The course was spread over four eight-​hour Saturdays; well worth the cost considering the knowledge and skills attained. On the last day there is a practical and written test, and if you pass you get certified. I’m not above mentioning that I was the top-​scoring dude on the practical exam. I «won» the honour of doing a «muff dive» shot in front of the entire class. I’ll be sure to post the video of this online never.
Lots of fun. Check it out.
Obligatory Title Pun: Satisfy your THIRST for knowledge.
Menu Readability: Someone needs to redo their lesson manual posthaste. It’s loaded with typos and low-​res raster images. I think it was made in Word. PUKE.
Need to mention: They are opening a bar in the same space called Spirit House Toronto. Stay tuned.
What this place teaches me about myself: I rule the booze school. My mother will be so proud.