Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream

When we entered this Ben and Jerry’s recently, there were two young people working the counter and one was asking the other, «You going to college this fall?» The other one eyed the tip jar and replied, «Nah, not at this rate.»
Since the back of Westlake HEB receipts have discount coupons for this B & J’s, we bought two cones, used the coupon, and added the difference with our usual gratuity just to help fill the tip jar. Cheap price for chocolate and personal therapy.

I understand that a chair fell and broke the tempered glass in your display case which is miraculously still one large plate of tiny marbles and you think that your frozen cakes still in the case are exempt from glass shard cake «sprinkles» for your customers.
I understand that 4 small table tops may be difficult to keep clean with the oodles of kiddos who are not swarming to visit you when it has been 33 degrees for the entire month of January.
I understand that a scoop of Half Baked and a scoop of Chocolate Therapy should probably shut up most middle-​aged bitches who could use a lesson in overlooking the small stuff.
I understand that this store is a Partner Shop that works to support Lifeworks which teaches young people job and entrepreneurial skills and you may very well be one of the fresh-​faced entrepreneurs of 2010.
I understand that the floors suddenly getting mopped, the windows getting scrubbed, and the pungent smell of cleaning spray PROBably has something to do with my comment that the restroom could use a clean-​up.
I do not understand how, with the obvious lack of customers due to the recent cold-​spell that you lamented while I chatted with you as you scooped my ice cream, how HOW you could possibly think that I would believe that the pee in the toilet and on the toilet seat and the curly black pubic hair on the seat were anyone else’s but yours.
Ice cream. 10 points
Dirty store. –4 points
Attention to cleaning
after it was mentioned +2 points
80’sJourney music +1 point
Pube and pee –7 points
Total = 2 points