Debenhams

Dear Debenhams, your customer service sucks. Please see below.
So it started with a 3 hour session, going a little mental on the Debenhams website to order a new wardrobe of clothes. Unfortunately, when it came to check out, I couldn’t get to the point of payment, as the website kept looping back to insist that items ordered were out of stock. But I had ordered a lot, and there were no indications of what was failing to register. Between that and a failure to register my payment details had me tearing my hair out in frustration, resulting in the following email to Debenhams Customer Service:
Dear Debenhams Customer Relations;
I have spent the last 60 minutes trying desperately to drop a few hundred pounds at your esteemed door, but you are not letting me — or rather, your website isn’t. Instead, it keeps reverting me back to my basket, insisting that some of the items I have ordered, don’t exist. Which ones of the many I have ordered, I can’t actually tell, because, if you were not aware, I don’t have a telepathic connection to your warehouse, nor does your website tell me which ones are missing. At one point it took grievous offence at my credit card number, refusing to believe that it existed, nor choosing to give any understandable message as to why I wasn’t allowed to complete my purchase. The problem? I have no idea, like a crazy fool, I just went back to my shopping basket, and tried again — and it worked. This effort took two of us to try and beat the deviant nature of your checkout process to ensure I was typing in 12 numbers correctly — and for the life of me, I did nothing wrong. I don’t understand why your website punished me so. As I ended up back at my shopping basket once more with the incoherent message ‘Error: Some of the items in the cart do not have sufficient inventory. Please update the quantity.’ — I must have been sneered at for only wanting one of each item. I’ll also point out the grammatical omission of a space after the full stop between inventory and Please, because I am angry at the world right at this moment.
I would like the last hour of my life back. I don’t have any pretty new clothes, but I can’t face trying to fight your website any more. It wins. I shall not shop — at least at your stores-​come-​website.
Your’s, clothes-​less,
I thought I was playing rather nice.
The following day, I got some lovely marketing bumpf, with the rather inappropriate heading of ‘Comeback for 10% off your next order at Deben​hams​.com’, asking for my feedback on my failed order. That didn’t go down well, giving the reasons why I failed in the first place, and had already complained… getting a marketing email felt seriously invasive. I send an annoyed email follow up to my original email.
3 days later, I finally get a response to my first email.
«I am sorry to learn of the problems you have experienced in ordering through our Online Ordering Service. We strive to ensure each customer’s experience when using the website is a positive one, and so I am concerned to learn of your disappointment.
Please accept our sincerest apologies for any inconvenience you have been caused over the issues outlined in your email.
Rest assured that we appreciate all customer feedback, and your concerns have been logged to be passed on to senior management within Debenhams for use in future internal reviews.
Once again thank you for taking the time to write to us, and should I be able to answer queries on any future occasion, please do not hesitate to contact me.»
Cool, so no response regarding the actual problems I had submitting my order. I responded, to which I received a prompt response which included «Please accept my apologies if you feel the email sent to you was insensitive, that was not our intention and I am very sorry for any offence this caused.
We do appreciate all feedback at Debenhams and I have registered your complaint under the above reference number for senior management within Debenhams to review. «
So I asked to be updated when a response had been made. To be honest, at this point, a week in, I had looooong given up on actually getting a reasonable response that would equate to customer service rather than a bland response.
«Unfortunately it is not our senior managements policy to contact our customers directly. This will be reviewed by them to improve our service in the future.
I must apologise again for any inconvenience this has caused you. Once again thank you for taking the time to write to us, and should I be able to answer queries on any future occasion, please do not hesitate to contact me.»
…but when I contact you, you don’t resolve anything? I have to admit, I couldn’t resist… I did reply, but I know it’s fruitless.
So, platitudes aside, nothing fixed, and my winter wardrobe unbought. I’ll be collecting my wardrobe elsewhere. Thanks for not caring!