The Diner

Well, they do a mean milkshake.
The Diner is going to be OK. It’s not going to be amazing. It’s not going to be terrible. They do a giant menu filled with diner-​esq foods and you can get any of them and be happy. Not amazing, but happy.
The one in Dalston has that same rock and roll light vibe that they all do. The staff is on their game and you will eat quickly. Get the taco salad, it’s pretty good.
However, they really do make a mean milkshake and I will come in just for that sometimes. That’s pretty good.

I’ve been avoiding the diner in weak protest about the chainification of Hackney but thought I was being silly and decided to give it a go for lunch the other day. I really enjoyed my milkshake (which was probably a silly move as it’s very filling and should probably be saved for dessert) but my burger was… meh.
I ordered their famous diablo burger. The patty itself was cooked through but lacked juice, flavour and any ev. The thing is covered with american cheese (I don’t know what else to call it but I find it spoils the flavour of a perfectly decent burger and cannot fathom why people love it so much) and there were some contrasting flavours in the rest of the fillings that didn’t really do it for me.
Unfortunately, no lunch deals despite the place being quiet on a weekday lunch time meant that I paid £20 for a milkshake, burger and fries. I find this quite ridiculous considering the burger is not especially memorable. The milkshake itself, which is good, is way overpriced at almost £5!
I won’t be back. I just thought I’d give the place a go as it’s so close to my home. Instead it reminded me why I don’t go to the diner. They really need to up their game if they insist on focusing so much on burgers, Stokey bears is just up the road and Patty & Bun have opened up recently. There is no shortage of burgers available in Hackney these days and if you’re here when Street Feast is on, go there instead.

So, in continuing on with my slow tour of the Burger joints in my city I wandered into the Diner on a Friday night. I was craving meat having worked out a lot and had no protein or carbs all day. I was also reeling in shock from the latest developments in the story I was reading. My mind was blown before I walked in the door.
The diner was very good at calming me down, providing basic food and service with great music. The Californian Burger was just what the doctor ordered, it was a safe choice, it didn’t re-​blow my mind but provided a good burger with the right level of grease. The portion of chips was HUGE, I had maybe ¼ before I was full after the burger they were tasty but not amazing. It was a solid meal and the mojito was good.
I liked the style of the restaurant, though you felt a little close to the people in the booth beside you, the frosted glass not doing enough to hide you, perhaps because I am so tall.
It was my flatmate’s second time at the Diner, his first was for breakfast and he was more impressed this time around.
In short, better than meatliquor but not as good as BRGR​.CO

After going to The Diner in Shoreditch I was sure the one in Dalston would reach their high standards. Wrong. Service was smiley but slow front and back of house — they were turning people away from a half-​empty restaurant on a Sunday evening. Bloody Mary was thin & one-​dimensional, buttermilk chicken was overdone, Diablo burger was cooked legitimately rare but bland for a 3-​cut of beef patty. £5 chilli-​cheese chips were sad, soggy and small-​portioned. The chilli actually tasted like a recent Old El Paso packet mix-​flavoured fajita my flatmate whipped up last week. Side salad, meh. The best bit about the meal was the company sat opposite.

There are 11 tables being served here and 6 – 8 service staff around. I may be an American asshole regarding an «American styled» diner but I expect to be asked if I’d like something to drink when I appear to have settled into my booth. Nope.
Then I looked at the menu and wanted to leave but my laziness got the better of me.
I ordered a filter coffee (free refills gets one star!) and a veggie breakfast burrito. Burrito came and was scrambled eggs and watery colourless chopped tomatoes in a flour tortilla. There was a side of black beans and guacamole that were bog standard. Considering the price I hoped they would have paid more attention to the food than the design concept of the room.
I’ve been to these Diners before (nostalgia always gets the better of me) and I’ve always noticed they get things just slightly wrong from the service to the food. The presence of one in the neighbourhood always precedes an invasion of yummy mummies along with IT entrepreneurs willing to put up with expensive watered down versions of things that have «character» and hence the Diner thrives. I wish «progress» was less boring and crap than the diner.
The music was good (another star!!!).
I typed this on my phone. Apologies for types and crap grammar.

Look it’s a chain so they are all pretty much the same … So so american diner food in the main … But in that respect they are pretty authentic … Where they excel is the breakfast/​brunch … So again very authentic.
So as long as what you want is endless filter coffee and a giant stack of carbs I simply can’t recommend better …