La Taverne Suisse

Assez bon mais bien trop cher. 35 euros la fondue bourguignonne pour a peine une dizaine de morceau de viande et très peu de frites (qu’ils appellent pommes frites). La qualité n’étant de plus pas si exceptionnelle que cela. On trouve aussi bon à Paris pour moitié moins cher.
Évitons de parler des couverts mal lavé et des taches sur les nappes en papiers à notre arrivée.
Le restaurant était de plus vide (à tel point qu’à notre arrivée il n’y avait personne pour nous recevoir)
Bref je né recommanderais pas

THIS MAN WILL STEAL FROM YOU. Little better than the gypsy lady who smiles at you as her children steal the belongings from your pockets, this gentile 80-​year-​old swiss gentleman provides excellent if slow but steady service (reminding me of some methodical, but now dead friends and family), WILL STEAL FROM YOU!
GODDAMIT!
Tucked 4 blocks from the Champs Elisee (yeah, I just don’t care about the spelling right now), I thought we were far enough from the mouth-​breathing american tourists to find a good restaurant. We paused to look at the menu and were attracted by a mostly expensive but nicely refreshing offer of Raclette for 20 euros per person. Definitely a steep price, but hey, it’s a quiet street and looks like a quaint place.
The elderly gentleman– owner /​waiter /​bartender /​manager /​sommelier even came out of the restaurant to encourage us to come in as we looked over the menu. I should have taken this as a sign. STOOPID mickobizzle! GODDAMIT when will I learn?
Second clue, there was one other occupied table in the restaurant. Totally empty.
Third clue, the place smelled of multiple decades of cigarette smoke and nicotine from 1950. The kind that you can scrape from the walls with your finger.
Fourth clue, the salt and pepper shakers (see the pic) are from 1940 post-​war army-​surplus era, and they look like they haven’t been cleaned since then.
WHY OH WHY AM I SO F*@#$‘n POLITE?!! WHY DON’T I LEARN MY LESSON AND JUST FLEE??? GODDAMIT!!!
Well, it’s so that I can tell the story to you folks and hopefully put this guy out of business so he can retire to Florida (that’s in the USA) with his brother who’s already there waiting for him. GODDAMIT!
GODDAMIT! (oh, did I already say that?)
Raclette is melted cheese served over various help-​yourself foods. Think fondue, but without the crappy cheap wine (which I HATE, btw, so don’t you DARE serve me fondue! — I think this crappy-​wine-​factor accounts for the fact there is only one fondue restaurant in the entire metropolis that is my hometown) MERDE!
Fifth clue, this guy ladles out of a 3-​liter can of olives and a 2-​liter can of gerkins our munchies for apéritif. Why, oh, why don’t I learn? It’s because this guy is so suave and gentile, and I feel sorry for him being a restaurateur at 80+ years of age.
Ok, I didn’t flee because this guy reminds me of Ren Anderton, my dear dear dear friend who passed away last year. Just hearing the way he talks and watching the way he moves, makes me think of Ren and almost brings a tear to my eye. God bless you Ren. Love ya.
…
But all I have to say to you sir, is F@(K OFF! And GODDAMIT! (oh, I think I already said that)
* you stole 60 euros from us by changing the published price of 20 euros for raclette to 40 euros for the «dinner» serving, not published anywhere.
* charging us a 10% service fee on top of our bill, which I think is illegal in paris.
# the terrible duck terrine was OFF. Do you know how many weeks in your fridge it takes for a terrine to be OFF? F@(K YOU, sir! How dare you serve me rotten terrine?
55 euros each for canned green olives and gerkins,
2 portions of raclette, and
a pitcher of shitty white wine.
F@(K OFF and retire old gypsy man!
You owe me 40 euros.
@sarah s. — are you kidding me? «the best meal in paris»? get out a bit more, please!
@stacy b. — are you F@#K’n kidding me? best prices? ok. fine. go to your champs elisees bars and enjoy yourself.
cheers,
a BITTER mickobizzle.

A great meal, great service, and great prices! We are staying in the Champs-​Élysées area and came to this place based on its reviews. The onion soup, as Karl mentioned, is delicious. I ordered the cassoulet and it was off the charts. The owner was so nice! We liked it so much, I think we’ll go back before we leave.

When we got there, it was empty, however, it soon filled up. The man who appeared to be the owner greeted us warmly with a glass of wine and orange juice for the kids. We ordered fondue for 3 and while it was huge enough for the 4 of us to leave full (and delicious), we felt it was overly expensive for fondue. However, you have to remember where you are. Paris is not cheap, especially near the Champs-​Élysées. So we highly recommend it and would definitely go back.

The best meal in all of Paris!!! I’m not exaggerating when I say that no place has better food, better service, or a better atmosphere. Once you’ve had enough mediocre French food served up with the iconic French attitude try this place for amazing food at a great price, served fast and friendly with the feeling of eating among great friends!

Great prices for the area, service was friendly by the owner. Escargot and onion soup gratinee delicious, and the tournedos and country chicken fantastic. An apéritif was delivered, gratis, as we sat down, and tap water was free and clean. There was no service charge, but a 10 Euro tip got us an unexpected dessert. Out the door with full bellies for a total of 55 Euro, including wine!

Pas une bonne adresse
J’y ai dîné avec deux copines la semaine dernière. Le décor est plus kitsch et vieillot que typique. L’unique serveuse est désagréable (elle a grimacé dans mon dos quand je lui ai demandé si je pouvais être servie de mon plat en même temps que la fondue de mes amies !). Pour éviter les mauvaises surprises, j’avais choisi une entrecôte avec des frites. La viande était dure et les frites avaient un trop fort goût d’huile. Quand au jus d’ananas (servi dans un verre directement), il était tout bonnement écoeurant. Nous avons pris notre dessert ailleurs. Voici un restaurant, à deux pas des Champs Elysées, qu’il convient d’éviter.

Aie aie aie
La plus mauvaise raclette que j’ai jamais mangé ! C’est pas bon, et en plus c’est cher ! 33 euros pour une raclette sans goût avec de la charcuterie de mauvaise qualité ! S’abstenir !

La suisse bourré
Quand on rentre dans cette taverne, tout de suite on sent la Suisse et son fromage. Le décor est vieillot et sent le fromage. Le patron n’est pas sympa, un vrai pitbull qui lit le parisien. Le serveur est bourré. Voila l’attraction du lieu: a chaque fois qu’il vous ressert en fromage il s’en jette un petit derrière les cuisines. Donc il faut venir vers 20h pour voir la lente transformation d’un vieux garçon de bistrot digne et droit en titi parisien titubant et n’arrêtant pas de vous servir le fromage. Plus le gars est bourré moins il vous entend dire stop, donc un très, très bon resto ou l’on mange à s’en faire exploser le pantalon. Les plats sont bons et très copieux, malheur a celui qui a prix une entrée. Appremont sympathique.

Plus jamais
La Taverne Suisse… étant Suisse et en proie à la nostalgie du pays je me suis dit, quelle bonheur, un coin de Suisse à Paris. La déco est sympa, la petite carte de la Loire me rappelant cette région de Suisse que je connais si mal. Le vif du sujet: le service est mauvais, la carafe d ‘eau est arrivée en fin de repas, le garçon n’arrive pas à suivre, les tables sont tellement rapprochées qu’une fois assis, on y reste. Les caquelons à fondue né fonctionne pas bien du tout, nous avons demandé de les change sans grand résultat. La fondue est arrivée tiède, donc presque solide. Les prix sont exorbitants, l’apéritif pour 4 à un verre chacun nous coûté presque autant que les fondues. De plus le pain était vraiment sec. N’y aller pas pour la fondue ou le service.